what a fucking asshole dog.
I Yelped this:
Look, I’m a huge Dodger fan and I love Dodger Dogs and beer as much as the next guy. So what could be so wrong about getting to eat as much of it as you want while sitting behind the hottest ass in the MLB (#16 Andre Ethier!!!)? 3 things:
And in case you’re wondering, NO, the lines never get any better during the entire game. Expect to wait an inning to missing the entire game to get your food. It almost feels like you’re in a prison cafeteria because you get in line behind a bunch of angry looking cholos, pick up a tray, and go down the assembly line of hot dogs, nachos, popcorn, and soda until you get to the beverage station. Then you go sit down on some really hard benches and eat, except prison cafeterias are better because they have tables and you don’t have to do a juggling act to be able to eat and drink. Not even ONE cupholder.
Because the workers in the All-You-Can-Eat Pavillions have to keep up with the much higher demands of the fans in this section, they have to lower the quality and selection of the food.
The Dodger Dogs here are boiled, not grilled. The only upside is that the workers give out 2 at a time for each person, and if you ask nicely, they will give you more. As for the nachos, to speed up the never ending line, the workers start putting the cheese on top of the chips instead of on the sides and leave the nachos out for you to grab. In effect, you get cold yellow gooey stuff and soggy chips instead of nachos. The popcorn is already popped and bagged in plastic, and it isn’t hot or fresh. They kind of remind me of those little packing styrofoams. The soda fountains run out of ice so fast that by the time you get to it, there probably won’t be any ice and you’ll end up with a warm, flat coke (they also ran out of the coke syrup, so you will probably end up with warm flat soda water) and the peanuts are just peanuts. Nobody ever eats the peanuts anyway. Did I mention the line?
So Congratulations. You’ve just made it through the never ending food and beverage lines, your next mission: CONDIMENTS, STRAWS, AND NAPKINS. Good luck. Because they will always be out of jalepenos, mustard, relish, onions, napkins, and straws. And no, spills and messes are not cleaned up here. Also did I mention you have to stand in line for these too?
DON’T EXPECT TO FIND ANY GOOD SELECTION OF BEER HERE EITHER. (what’s a Dodger game without any Blue Moon?) Oh yeah, the lines.
Sure you just paid $30 for tickets and you probably have plans to eat $60 worth of hot dogs, nachos, popcorn, and soda (maybe even take 20 Dodger Dogs home too) but trust me, these seats are not worth it. Bleacher seats also make it uncomfortable and impossible for you to balance all that food on your lap while holding your beer because there are no cupholders. So you’re telling me that I can bring back 8 sodas but have nowhere to put them?! That’s ridonculous. People also tend to crowd more when sitting in these bleachers. Maybe because they are all fatty-mcfattersons. They also suck when you have people constantly going in and out of their seats to get more effing food. Sit down and watch the game, a-hole.
In conclusion, if you absolutely must have to buy tickets for the All-You-Can-Eat Pavillions because the Dodgers are in the World Series and those are the only seats left, keep in mind that those people are there with plans to eat until they die, not plans to enjoy the game. So please, have some respect for yourself, and others, and sit in the lodges behind 3rd base. Get your grilled Dodger Dogs in a leisurely manner, enjoy hot cheese on your fresh nacho chips with jalepenos on the side, and enjoy better ice cold beer, because life is too short to drink bad beer. Do you want to have a good time at a baseball game or do you want to sit in a prison cafeteria that has no tables?